Time Alone

On top of a double pitch in City of Rocks, Idaho

While running along a wooded lane in Ohio a few days ago, I got tangled up in my thoughts which tend to run into each other without any real logic. Soon I found myself thinking of the person who, of late, sits beside me in the car for hours on end- the same person who shares a tent with me, my meals, climbing responsibilities and conversations. Because of our current project, we are together 24/7, literally, until now.

Circumstances changed in Ohio. Steve went one way for family, I went another. We both had short-term jobs to earn some much needed extra money and because of that, we were (as he put it) "accidentally" separated. Not having a phone on this trip means that I've had one 20 minute chat conversation with him through gmail during the week we've been apart.

Steve's special day

As my pace quickened on the downhill, snippets of the things Steve and I have done together played through my mind like clips from a movie. I thought back to our first "date" nine months earlier (which, tellingly, turned into an 11 hour road trip) when I discovered I kinda liked this guy who approached me at the climbing gym; our road trips to Steamboat/Vail, and St. George; ice climbing in Ouray; skiing the countless powder days of the 2010-11 ski season at Brighton, Powder Mountain, Snowbird, Solitude and Snowbasin. And of course I saw mini-versions of all the adventures we've had so far on The Most Epic Trip.

It isn't just the trips, though. Running along, I was more cognizant of the thoughts I had as those adventure clips flashed through. I thought of a time in a Leavenworth hat store where Steve was a wizard and I was Medusa, which reminded me of how much I love when we're just playing around. I thought of all the times we've discussed projects we'd like to take on, which made me think of how creative he is in scheming up & developing new ventures. A scene from a particularly scary night of camping in a Bellingham beach cove crossed my mind and I remembered feeling safe if I just squeezed in a little closer to him. More and more scenes played and thoughts came flooding through: I've never been so evenly matched in skiing, I've never met someone who's as ready to take off and explore, I've never met someone else who thinks life is about living first and making money... well, last. I've never met anyone who seriously deliberates my St. Patty's day ski outfit at a thrift store... or who has a St. Patty's day outfit to deliberate in the first place.

Our carefully chosen St. Patty's Day ski uniforms

My point is: I haven't had a lot of time since being on this trip to reflect on the reasons why Steve is such a big part of my life. During the course of "normal" everydayness, people see each other in the mornings and reconvene in the evening. Because of our trip, we've defied the everydayness of normal dating life and put ourselves in a place where we are rarely alone with just our thoughts. I've always believed time away from each other is part of a healthy, balanced relationship. Our separate ways in Ohio has been a powerful demonstration in the affirmative for that thinking.

My final thought as I was finishing my run was that I wanted to write about my thoughts on a blog post. I woke up the next morning to find, without any discussion between us, that he had also had the same idea. Written on our trip's blog was an entry he posted on the same topic. The thought going through my head? I can't wait to see his face in just a few more days.

Is there someone whose qualities you may have been overlooking lately?